Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Self-Care, Healing, and Forgiveness Pt. 2

I'm writing this blog in the mid afternoon, sipping some Tiesta tea, Energizer blend.  I received a box yesterday from a friend (let's talk about care packages as promoting self-care!) that included all types of lovely things, the above linked tea was included.  Teas are among my favorites for self-care.
Hot tea is good for the soul!
Another part of self-care is to open ourselves up to healing.  I'm not speaking about physical healing, (although tea is good for that too!) I am referring to emotional healing.  I think this type of healing is perhaps the most difficult to go through.  Many times the only way we can sufficiently heal is to seek profession help.  Other times we can take small steps on our own to work through hurts.

As I was thinking about what, exactly, I would write about in regards to emotional healing, I was confronted by some things within myself that I need to heal from.  It is hard to be open to healing because we often use our hurts like a blanket, holding on tightly in hopes to protect ourselves from further harm.  The only thing is, this particular blanket is ugly, coarse, and will never cover us sufficiently enough.  Forgiveness is one way to move toward healing, I will talk about that in my next post, but there is more.

I think that my favorite way of moving past hurts is to do symbolic rituals of "letting go".   (Cue Frozen theme song!) This isn't an act of forgiveness, it is an act of acknowledging your hurt.  The most simple way to do this is to write out, "I feel hurt because..." Fill in the rest, focusing on the hurt.  For example, "I feel hurt because I want to be noticed for my work instead of being looked over by my boss."  No other explanation is needed.  Just acknowledge your hurt, acknowledge the reason for it, take that piece of paper, and burn it as a symbol of freeing yourself from that hurt.  Please understand that by releasing the hurt, you are NOT under any circumstances excusing bad behavior on the part of another.  Choosing to "be above such things" is solely for your own health, and acknowledging our emotions is a very healthy practice.  Male or female, you have emotions.  The way you feel about any given thing is a natural response to a stressor.  NEVER feel ashamed for your emotions, and NEVER beat yourself up over them.  The way you feel is valid.  Acknowledge your validity, and acknowledge your emotions, then release them.  When we release our own hurt, we can in turn find compassion and kindness towards others.  I know that when I am holding on to some hurtful things, I tend to become negative and bitter.  My negativity and bitterness helps me to feel more "thick-skinned" when in reality it is only hurting me more.  It is a vicious cycle.  Releasing the hurt that we have received helps us to become more balanced, understanding, and lovely individuals. It allows us to grow into who we are at our core instead of who society and others dictate we should be.  When we partake in a symbolic act of releasing hurt, it helps to give us something tangible to hold on to as a remembrance that we are no longer allowing emotional pain to dictate who we are.  You can use something from your ritual that will remind you of what you've done.  I like pocket rocks.  You can use a crystal or any other rock and keep it with you as a symbol of positive emotions.  Or pick a flower and press it in a journal as a symbol of the new life you are embracing.  Whatever it is, it should serve in remembrance of letting go.  Now you can continue to practice letting go every time that hurt tries to seep back into your soul.
Picture found on She Who Is

On March 20th there is a new moon, solar eclipse, and the vernal equinox.  This is a good time to practice healing and releasing rituals.  You can incorporate it into any type of belief system you have. There is no specific prayer to pray that works better than any other, and if you don't believe in prayer, you can believe in symbolism.  I will have my husband build the fire in the fire ring in the yard instead of on the patio.  I'm going to write down some things that have hurt me, acknowledge my feelings, the hurt, and then I'm going to choose to let it go by burning the papers under the new moon.  With the vernal equinox, I will accept new life and beauty into my sphere and try to focus on the positive things, the non-hurtful, that surround me.  I will also journal, not about the hurt, but about my ceremony, my letting go and what new and positive things I expect.  Spring is a perfect time for this because it is the time of year when we see new life, new beauty emerging from the depths of the cold harshness of winter.   (Here is a link to other moon rituals).  There is a silent grace and beauty about the moon.  She brings me peace and acceptance when I struggle to find some.  May you find your path to healing and continue to grow into the beautiful individual you are at your core.

Light and Love.

No comments:

Post a Comment